my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
