some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
