if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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