How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
