i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
