His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize