You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
