i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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