I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Randomize
