i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize