covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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