Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
