Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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