Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
