Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
