I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
