God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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