He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize