btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I want to fling myself into the sun