That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I did not marry a roomba.
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