It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Randomize