People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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