It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
