My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
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