It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
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