You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
