I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
