he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Randomize
