Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Randomize
