I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
You're my little dorito
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Enjoy the penises
If I die, sorry about rent.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
