FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
50% drunk capacity currently
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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