Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
should my penis look like a turkey
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize