A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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