Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
