We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize