Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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