THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Randomize
