break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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