sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
