The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
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I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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