i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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