Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I'm too high and old for this...
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