Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
