I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
