A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
