So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize