This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
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