just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize