Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
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