I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Is her dick bigger than yours?
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
