omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I think your dad took our porno
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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