so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
